Think, Suzanne

Ok, so sometimes I have realizations that really get me. I ask myself questions like: Why didn't you think about that before you said something? Why didn't you think about how that might affect you and those around you? Why are you doing this to yourself?

The reality is...I just need to think. Think before I act...think before I say things. It would really save me a lot of trouble in the end. My new goal...is to think.

On another note...everything else except for the thinking thing is going pretty well. I've started having very mixed feelings about what to do next year and where to go. By that I mean that the past week or so I've felt that it is a very strong possibility that I stay here and apply for teaching jobs in Cedar. If it's where I need to be...then in Cedar I shall stay.

I have to say that I am grateful for the blessings in my life. I know that I am loved and well taken care of. I don't deserve all the things that are provided for me at very little effort on my part. I will continually be humbled by my weaknesses...and reminded that "I know in whom I have trusted." Definitely a little rambling tonight...but the truth none the less.

Life is Hard...

So...I had great plans to post all about my exciting and option filled future...all the Grad School Applications I'm filling out...the teaching positions that I'm looking into, all the excitement in my social life...and all the other wonderful things happening in my life...

WELL...it turns out that even for someone so seemlingly eternally optimistic as myself...that life is hard. I don't know what the future holds. I actually have no idea. I am looking into all my options...but don't feel particularly drawn to any one thing. It's really frustrating. So for today...just for this little while I am going to be a pessimist. I am going to say that everything is not ok. I'm living in limbo right now...and it's ok. I will say that I am looking forward to having some direction...sometime in the future. And...I will say that I do know that something will work out. I know there is a plan for me.

But for today...I feel like this:

New Beginnings

So I am pretty sure most of you think I have fallen off the face of the earth. In all reality...I have been pretty much MIA for the last couple months from the blogging world. I am going to try and stay a little more on top of things. I had a great holiday season and am looking forward to a new year. I have lots of plans and resolutions for 2011.

Stay tuned for some updates. :)